Virtues of Character

Love

Love closely unites us to God in friendship and a community of life. Love is about how we relate to others: to God and neighbour. Christians say that hope sets them free to love - a word much misunderstood in the world today. When a Christian uses it correctly, she does not mean syrupy inward 'feelings' and other mushy gush - she means something practical, something that is received from others and given to others, something that is both open and outward looking.

For a Christian, love means affirming the eternal significance of every individual, regardless of their stage in life, and giving up time, effort, even oneself for their fulfilment. It means giving up opportunities for personal satisfaction now in order to realize good for others. The good of the other, not their own good, should dominate their motives and projects. This even includes our enemies - perhaps the most challenging aspect of the Christian way.

Christians do not claim to be perfect at the task - in fact, on the contrary, they recognise that they fall short daily in this. But they do claim that their lives are about learning how to live for others; even though they fall short, a Christian should be aware of the need to pick themselves up again and give it another go. The fundamental characteristic of Christian 'love' (as opposed to more romantic, feelings-based or lust-driven understandings) is the ability to sacrifice for the good of the other, even when there will be no return, even when it will be rejected, even when it is for enemies. Essentially, Christian love is outward looking, not inward looking. It's not so much about the rise and fall of our emotions, our passions, our feelings; it's more about practical action on behalf of the other.